🎄 How to Talk to Your Kids About a Tight Christmas Budget 🎄

The cost-of-living crisis is hitting Kiwi families hard as Christmas approaches. With rising prices for essentials like food and petrol, there might not be much left for presents and holidays. It's tough, but talking to your kids about your financial struggles is important, even though it can be a challenging conversation, especially when they're excited about the holidays. Here’s how you can approach the chat to make it a bit easier on everyone.

Finding the Right Time and Words

Choose a calm moment for this conversation, like a relaxed weekend morning. Avoid bringing it up when everyone is stressed or busy.

When you do talk, be honest, gentle, and direct. Kids are often more perceptive than we give them credit for and might already sense your financial challenges.

Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Instead, explain the situation truthfully, letting them know it's a temporary challenge and that you're working on it. This shows them that you're in control and working towards a better future.

Here's an example of how to start the conversation:

"Hey, I wanted to talk to you about something important. You've probably noticed we've been cutting back on spending lately, and I wanted to explain why.

The cost of things we need, like food and petrol, has gone up, which means we have less money for things that aren't essential.

This year, we won't be able to buy expensive presents or go on a big holiday like we usually do. I know this is disappointing, but I want you to understand that being together as a family and our love for each other are what truly matter.

Let’s discuss how we can celebrate Christmas without spending a lot of money and still create some really special memories."

Adjusting the Conversation for Their Age

Using the right language is crucial. What you say to a 7-year-old will be different from what you say to a 12-year-old. Here are a couple of examples to guide you.

For a 7-Year-Old:

"Hey, sweetie. You know how we use money to buy food and petrol? Well, those things cost a lot more now, so we have to be extra careful. That means we won't be able to buy as many big presents for Christmas this year. It's okay to feel a little sad, but let’s think of some fun, free things we can do together to make this Christmas super special."

For a 12-Year-Old:

"Hey, I wanted to talk about our family's finances. The cost of living has really gone up, which means our budget is tighter. We've had to make some adjustments, and that means we won't have a big Christmas budget for gifts and travel this year.

I know this might be disappointing, but I want to be honest with you. We can use this as an opportunity to focus on what's truly important and come up with creative ways to celebrate that don't cost a lot. What do you think would be a fun family activity to do?"

Creative Alternatives and Presents

While the focus is on experiences, the reality is kids still expect gifts. This is a chance to get creative and teach valuable lessons about resourcefulness.

Shift the focus from what you can't do to what you can do together. The key is to find creative, budget-friendly alternatives that still feel special and fun.

Ideas include:

• Host a pool party: Go to the local public pool with friends and pack a picnic.

• Go on an adventure: Explore a new bushwalk or beach with a packed lunch.

• Camp out: Pitch a tent in the backyard for a night under the stars.

• Have a movie night: Invite friends over for a movie marathon with homemade pizzas. 🍕

When it comes to presents, try the "Four-Gift Rule": one gift they want, one they need, one to wear, and one to read. This sets clear expectations and shows them that thoughtful presents can still be part of the day.

You can also create DIY gifts together, like baking cookies or making personalised cards. Or, give the gift of time or skills by making a "coupon book" of experiences. Examples could be "One hour of gaming with Dad" or "A baking session with Mum." These gifts truly show love and care.

Acknowledge and Validate Their Feelings

If your child gets upset, it’s important not to dismiss their feelings. Listen without interrupting and without judgment.

Acknowledge that their disappointment is valid and important. This helps them feel heard and respected.

Try using phrases like:

• "I can see that you're feeling upset and disappointed, and that's okay. It's totally normal to feel this way."

• "I hear you, and I'm here for you. Let's find a way to work through this together."

• "I understand you were really hoping for that present. It's tough when things don't go as you expected."

Remember to be kind to yourself, too. It’s tough on us as parents when we can't give our kids everything we'd like, but your love is what truly matters.

Turn It into a Life Lesson

This isn't just a tough conversation; it's an opportunity to teach your kids some of life's most important lessons. By being transparent and focusing on what you value most, you're teaching them about:

• Resilience: How to handle disappointment and find happiness in different ways.

• Financial Literacy: Introducing them to the reality of budgeting and making tough choices.

• The Difference Between Wants and Needs: Highlighting that true happiness comes from relationships and experiences, not just things.

How do you handle tough conversations like this in your family?

Kanchana Hoy is a life coach who applies her background as a psychotherapist to empower women, mums, and teen girls. She helps them create actionable plans to address their struggles and foster stronger, more meaningful connections with their children and loved ones.

Find out more at https://www.kanchanahoy.com.